Monday, July 19, 2010

The Name of the Game: "Waiting"


I love games! Any kind of board game will do! Trivia type games, in particular, are my absolute fave! Recently, however, I started what we shall call "The Waiting Game" and as it turns out, I HATE this game! The most important rule in this game is patience, which I horribly lack! Those who know me well know not to give me ANYTHING that requires assembly, unless they want to see it smashed to smithereens or thrown out the window (Christmas Eve in the Loccisano household puts me WAY over the edge). Even as a child I always had to be reminded about having a patience. As a typical, "grade A" sinner, I want what I want and I want it NOW! Remember the original Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and sweet little Veruca Salt? She wanted "the whole world, and wanted it now"? Yeah, well that's me! My parents even gave me that name as a nickname for a while.
As I am deep into my 9th month of pregnancy, I have really been tested and refined in the area of patience. I have done so well for the most part, and for a while there I was fine being pregnant forever because I have been so scared about the next part (parenting), which I hear also requires patience. I hit my brick wall this past Saturday night. I had my doctor's appt. Saturday morning, and even though I have dilated, she didn't sound too hopeful that the baby would be coming any time soon, and said it may be a bit into August before he comes!! Even though I know the Lord is in control and He will decide when I will meet my baby, I still left feeling a tad discouraged. The rest of my Saturday was great! I got my hair done, got a pedicure, ate at the Varsity (hoping the grease would induce me), and saw a movie (I still don't know what it was about)! On our way home, I burst into tears! Even though I had a lovely evening, I was unbearably uncomfortable! The skin on my stomach has stretched so much that it HURTS to touch, my heartburn is so bad that I consider Tums to be a legitimate food group, my back was killing me, and it was bedtime, which is the worst part of the day for me because I haven't been sleeping well at all! I know Chris thought that he was married to some crazy loony tune, and when he asked what was wrong, all I could say was " I WANT THIS TO BE OVER!!!!!
I have hit my breaking point, and to think that I still may have a few weeks left is pretty discouraging. I am praying about my attitude and lack of patience, and trying to be receptive to what life lessons the Lord is teaching me through this. The good thing is that I know that I WILL win "The Waiting Game" because Cooper can't stay in me forever...or can he?

5 comments:

  1. Its so hard at the end, Ashley. I remember sitting on the floor of Target the week before I had Lexie because I just could not walk another step. You have been so patient this whole time, and you will have great patience with Cooper, I am sure.

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  2. Just so you know, the doctors are not always right! He will come when he's done cooking!! Enjoy these last few weeks---rest and get out and do what you want to do!!!

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  3. You are going to win this game, even if you feel you are in last right now! I haven't been in your position so I am sorry that you hurt. I too will pray for you for comfort, strength, and patience.

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  4. Hi Ashley,

    Following you now on NFF, pls. follow back!

    Ron

    http://inspiredbyron.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete

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