Monday, May 2, 2011

Motherhood...

When I was a kid, I had a big imagination. Big hopes. Big dreams. I wanted to live in New York. I wanted to be a news anchor. I wanted to be an actress. I wanted to DO SOMETHING. ANYTHING. I wasn't sure that I wanted to be a mom, let alone a stay-at-home-mom.

The years passed by, those dreams began to fade, I grew older. When you grow up, life begins to happen. Marriage. Rent. Bills. Reality. You gotta do what you gotta do to survive.For a while, I felt lost. I didn't know what I should be doing with the life that the Lord has given me. I was incredibly discontent with where the Lord had me, and if I'm being honest, I was embarrassed. I became desperate for change.

...Then I became pregnant (you can read about that here)...
It did take me 9 months to warm up to the idea. A lot of reading. A lot of asking for advice. A lot of praying. And on July 30, 2010 with a final push, I was pushed into the role I never really thought I would have. Motherhood.
Can I tell ya somethin? This is it. This is the life. I'm so glad that the Lord has His plans (Jer. 29:11) and knows what's best.I am doing what the Lord designed for me to do and I'm thriving. I have flourished at "my new job," enjoying every moment! It's gonna get harder, I'm sure of it, but for today, it's about savoring the small things. Taking an afternoon break for sandboxes, reading "I Love You Stinky Face" half a million times, letting Kidd-O take 2 baths in a day (one that is very necessary, and one that's just for fun), leaving messes until tomorrow so we can go for a walk... all because I can. No, it's not the glamorous job that I had always dreamed of, and no, I haven't finished college... and maybe I'll finish someday... or maybe not, but for now, I am exactly where I am meant to be. Serving in my home, being a mom and still working at becoming more than a housewife rookie...

4 comments:

  1. What a sweet post! And you are, as I tell everyone, the best mom and the best wife ever...and certainly to my son! We appreciate all that you do to care for Cooper but also to care for our son...We praise the Lord for you often! And we love you, Ash...Happy 1rst Mother's Day!!

    Gemma and Coach:)

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  2. Ashley, this is so sweet. Motherhood changes everything, doesn't it? I never really believed it until it happened! It is the best job in the world and makes life so much more full and meaningful.

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  3. very sweet ashley...you look like you are right where you are supposed to be.

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  4. I love this post.... I love your beautiful honesty and the love you have for your new life as a mommy. What a lovely, lovely lady you are and I hope your mother's day is as special, gorgeous and lovely as you!

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